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The Most Important Moment of My Life Was In a Public Washroom


I was safely enclosed in my semi private stall in a very public bathroom staring at a tiny white plastic stick with two very distinctive pink stripes staring back at me. Oh My GOD! What am I doing here!? I started to shake. I may have been holding my breath, I'm not sure. I just remember feeling like I needed to tell myself to breath. I grabbed the stick and tossed it into my purse, told myself to get a grip and removed myself from the safety of my bathroom stall. I walked myself over to the counter to wash my hands and stared at myself in the mirror.

I looked the same. Nothing had changed except for a red nervous rash that was spreading across my chest and up my neck. But for the first time in my life I was looking at myself as a mother. Everything had just changed forever. I managed to walk myself out of the ladies room and re-enter the mall. I felt hot and dizzy. I needed my Kevin. I had to talk to him, NOW. I started to make my way to the other end of the mall toward the pay phones.

If you are wondering why I didn't just call him on my cell phone it would be because I can't stand the phone and therefore refused to carry one around with me so people can get a hold of me any time any where. But at that point I was suddenly wishing I owned a cell phone. Once I managed to buy some gum and get myself some change for the pay phone Kevin told me he'd be another 20 minutes before he could come and get me. 20 minutes! Oh my GOD! I had to find some way to distract myself! So I went shopping. It was the longest 20 minutes of my life to date.

2 comments:

tara said...

can't wait to hear his response! congrats ... very exciting. smart to document all of this - i love it!

Kiki said...

Thanks! My mother documented things from my childhood in a 3 ring binder that I found when I was 15. I loved her stories. So I want to create my children's own stories. One day I will have them bound into books for them to have always. But not any time soon. ;)

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